Mera Sapna

At the airport on our way to Goa, Praneet stood chatting with some guy while I was making my way to the loo. When I walked up to them, Praneet casually introduced him as Kumar. I did not really pay attention - Kumar could be a business colleague, an ex colleague, some club fellow, a college mate or someone from IIT. Praneet then turned to me and said,‘ This is Kumar, the guy we are buying the house from.’ My jaw dropped and then made a huge O.
Shit! This was Kumar Gaurav - my first ever celebrity crush!
In that summer of 1980, there was not a single 11 (or for that matter 12, 13, 14...) year old girl who did not fall in love with the chocolate faced KG. I still remember swooning when KG comes into Love Story in his single seater airplane and smiles. And drooling over him when he sat in the middle of the lake with his boots and a fishing rod. And hating Vijeta Pandit when they sing ‘Dekho Maine Dekha Hai yeh ek sapna’! I must have spent countless nights fantasizing that I was the heroine in Love Story!And cut out his pic from every magazine and stuck them in my room, locker and books! My books also had scribbles of Preeti Kumar, Preeti Gaurav, blah blah!
And so when Praneet was first going to meet him, I told him to tell KG that I was besotted with him. An amused Praneet told me to do the favour myself when I met him!
And I had planned my first meeting with KG in great detail. Had planned what I was going to say to him - rehearsed it in front of the mirror even.
And like all best plans, this one crashed miserably when I failed to recognise my heart throb. And I was so embarrassed the rest of the flight. I could not look at him though he sat diagonally from me and was being very approachable and sweet.
So I don’t want to imagine what my next meeting with him will be! And then it may turn out just fine!

From the past!

Twenty five years ago I left my hostel after my 10th boards. And then 25 years later I hooked up with some of my old pals. Teji who was my best friend and a ‘boyfriend’ KG !
And it was a bittersweet experience. There are so many things that I was reminded of, and so many that I have no recollection of! It feels really funny - I am trying to find threads from my memory that can connect events. For instance, why were we kneeling in the school? And how did I meet KG? And did KG and I become “boyfriend - girlfriend’. And why was Teji not around me when we went to the Boy’s school? And where was Teji when I was punished? What was I punished for anyway?
I can’t find answers. There is a hazy cloud in my mind that just does not lift. And there is no-one I can turn to for answers because Teji and KG also have vague memories!
It is a strange experience. When I was that age, I thought I would never ever lose touch with my friends that I was in the hostel with. I thought I would always remember the names of each of those 25 girls who was my class mate. And I would remember all the details of my friends in my slam book. I fought bitterly when my parents told me I was not going back to school for my 12th.
And yet, life passed me by....23 years went by before I discovered facebook and found some girls that I remembered from my class. Other faces looked familiar and yet I can’t recollect their names or any details.
Today, my daughter is at the same threshold of life. Besotted with her peer group and cannot dream of a life without them! I don’t have the heart to tell her that she will grow up not remembering most of them. And when she does meet them, she may not remember any details about them.Life will go on without these friends and she will move on to make more, better friends and gain more experiences.
But this I can tell her - it is such a tingly happy feeling to meet those that you do remember. And it is great fun trying to remind each other of shared experiences. Even though we look so different and know nothing of each other in the present day, the memories of the shared past are enough to re-establish new relationships!

Legacy and the importance of it

A legacy or legacies is what someone or something is remembered for or what they have left behind that is remembered, revered or has influenced current events and the present day.A legacy continues to be used, typically because it still functions for the users' needs.
I always understood legacy as cultural heritage one wanted to preserve. So my grandmother’s mutton curry, learning Gurmukhi to read the Guru Granth Sahib or the weekly trips to the vegetable market to touch and feel foods were my ideas of legacy for my kids.
The word has new connotations for me now . It is the word that is being used terribly lot by the politicians under fire these days - legacy of their predecessors.
I am impressed the politicians actually have role models that they revere and follow so blindly. And these role models are not Ambedkar or Gandhi, or even Nehru that they garland so religiously on all important occasions. These role models are the ones who have taught them to subvert the system and lead a good life!
None of our politicians are actually doing anything wrong. They are only carrying forward the good work done by their revered heroes. So Sharad Pawar is the sugarcane baron because his ancestors were also cheats and thieves. Raj Thackeray is a rabble rousing idiot coz his hero Bal Thackeray also thrived doing this.The devoted Aditya Thackeray is also following suit. Raja robbed the country of all the money because his hero Karunanidhi has also amassed great wealth. Yeddurappa did nothing wrong - it is the norm for politicians (like the emperors before them) to award land to their relatives and chamchas. Rahul Gandhi , for all his charming looks (legacy of his parents) is in politics making tall statements because of his political legacy, that helps him ‘understand’ this country.And really, that is exactly what Kalmadi did - our hygiene, safety and all other standards are different from the White Man’s. (And the Yellow Man’s!)
What I am loving - the way ALL the parties are screaming about corruption .As if it is not a political legacy they have ALL inherited. In Bandra, Baba Siddique’s family has been awarded all land re-development projects; check the number of PE funds that run on politicians money; investigate how many politicians have personal interests in infrastructure projects in India.
We all know these things. The only thing to do now is to subvert the constitution and let the politicians make hay - that is also their legacy as is our legacy to behave like dumb cattle.

The Kalaghoda festival

I moved to Mumbai some eight years ago and never quite managed to get to the Kalaghoda festival held every year in February. Until last year, when I was invited to curate the literature festival at Kalaghoda. And I became a convert.
No other city in India boasts of a festival like the Kalaghoda fest. Arts, Music, Dance Drama ,Photography, Movies and literature make up this lovely festival. For 9 days, the Mumbaikars have an opportunity to attend special workshops, meet with artists and authors ,partake of superior performances ,see splendid art and craft and help NGOs that work across a cross section of underpriveleged people.And it is not an elitist festival - people from all walks of life participate and attend the festival.
The Kalaghoda Festival for me is the symbol of what is right with Mumbai - the vibrant arts, the thinking minds, the selflessness of the many volunteers ,organisers , NGOs and Civic bodies who try to showcase their city. A bunch of people come together every year to create an experience that is unique only to Mumbai. It is not done for personal glory or fame (how many of us know the names of the KG Organising Committee)?
Therefore, my distress is complete. The November Kalaghoda festival is not happening because Rampart Row is a silence zone now.There is a cloud over the February festival too. The Kalaghoda festival cannot disrupt the peace.This despite the Church on Rampart Row not against the Kalaghoda festival.
This is cheesy - coming from an administration that has not been able to curb the incessant honking on the roads at the silence zones. That allows noise to be created in the name of religion - with the navratri pandals, Ganpati , Dahi Handi festivals that make life miserable. That does not have the courage to stand up to a Shiv Sena that blatantly flouts the norms at its Dusshera show of strength.
And we complain about the one thing that brings Mumbai pride and joy.

Thank You Aditya Thackeray

The young always have a fresh perspective, and thank you AT for helping me look at things differently too!
With Nishna on the verge of entering the eight grade, we were faced with a huge dilemma. Should we take the tried and tested Indian board ICSE, or go with the relatively unknown IGCSE board?
As Indians who went through the Indian system and competed with the best,(and are not doing too badly in life) we felt that the Indian system is the best. And if you can crack the exams and get into St Stephens, SRCC or the IITs then you have arrived!
But Such a Long Journey, made me realise the futility of my dreams.Who am I fooling? From the heady days when we lustily protested against the Mandal Commission, things have only gone downhill for the educated Middle Class. Suddenly, instead of a 100% seats based on merit, there were only 50% seats that that you could potentially get into based on merit. Merit included not only marks, but Dad’s bank balance and political connections that you might have. Not that the SC/ST 50% seats got filled - but those were out of bounds for the meritorious.
It does not take a historian or a social observer to figure that the quality of higher education has dipped in India. Colleges are political hotbeds where teachers do not turn up to take classes and kids while away their time for three years.
Mumbai is even more special - unlike other parts of India, where kids are in ‘school’ till the 12th, the Mumbai kids get into Junior College! So whereas, other Indian kids waste three years of their lives, Mumbai kids are gifted an additional 2 impressionable years.
Compare to China and you can forsee that in the future Indian kids in India will lose any competitive advantage they may historically have had.
Why would I want my kids to struggle so much for such little value? It might be better for them to go abroad, compete with the best globally and make a life for themselves. Why would I subject them to a culture where creativity is hindered and where the poor VC capitulated immediately to a young Thackeray , because who was going to protect him from goonda raj?
This government is not for the educated middle class! That poor VC must have feared for his and his family’s life. He would not get police protection - that is only the prerogative of the politicians. He could have been beaten up, killed and noone would have been brought to the book. Even the police and politicians lose their nerve in front of the mighty Thackerays, so what is a poor VC?
Can we really blame him? Is he weak, spineless, an unthinking adult? I don’t think so.
He is a smart adult who wants to live longer.
And thank you Junior Thackeray - my kids are definitely going to be out of bounds for people like you!And will go international!

The Chilean Miners

I have been following the Chilean Miners saga with keen interest. And felt a lump in my throat everytime a miner was pulled up after having survived 70 days in the hot, humid and dark bowels of the earth. I watched as President Pinera stood by his men and hugged them as they emerged from the Fenix capsule.
And felt so proud, so utterly overwhelmed on behalf of a country that I might have never visited, were I not young and naive!
12 years ago, when my husband decided to go to Chile (or Chilli as I pronounced it then) on an assignment, I was happy. Happy coz I had a six month old baby, had just executed my biggest placement deal with a MNC and wanted to travel abroad. That it meant a nine hour flight to London, then a 12 hr flight to Beunos Aires and then another 2 hours to Santiago - I had no idea. That it was in the Southern Hemisphere and therefore bitterly cold in June - I had no idea. That people spoke no English, only Spanish - I had no idea.That it was such a developed country - I had no idea.
But Chile was the best experience of my life. ‘Donde Se Dekha La Basura’ was the first Spanish sentence I learnt -I wanted to ask the conceirge where I could throw the garbage in the apartment. My best friend was the beautiful Arachelli from Spain and I don’t know how we communicated coz we did not speak each other’s language!
Chile was where my taste buds exploded - the local food - the empanadas, pollo asado and polenta were so good ; the supermarkets overflowed with delicious avocados, tomatoes , apples and oranges and I learnt that Chile was a net exporter of this produce. I learnt also that after the US, Chile was the largest consumer of sodas and sparkling water. Their sea food was amazing and we were always queasy watching the locals buy fresh mussels by the kilos, squirt them with big lemons and eat them raw! Chicken had been a johnny come lately to the country.
I learnt that Chileans were the British of South America - they were not as demonstrative as the rest of the Latinos,dressed as conservatively as the Brits and they drank tea. High tea was equally much an occasion here with delicious pastries and tarts. And ‘cortado’ - the coffee with some sort of foam was an ideal beverage at the malls. Pisco sour was a misleading drink and would have you tipsy in no time and the world had not yet discovered the wonderful Chilean wines.
I learnt also that the US was not America and that the country was nuts about football. I learnt too that Chileans were deeply religious and strict Catholics and that was the reason why there were so many teenage pregnancies that were supported by the families.
The Chileans had been removed from the rest of the world for the longest time because of the Alps.
I learnt that the invaders from Spain had inter married with the Mapuche Indians and that was why Chileans looked so different from the other Latinos. That there was still a hierarchy with the pure breds being at the top of the value chain. I learnt also that Chileans kept to themselves because of the horrors they had undergone during General Pinochet’s dictatorship . Many of their men and husbands had gone missing in the dead of the night and protests were peaceful with only a banging of utensils.
An hour out of Santiago , and depending on the direction you took, you could reach the sea or the mountains or the deserts or even , as it happened to us once, a world class ski resort (Portillo). Or even Neruda, where the Nobel laureate Pablo Neruda lived.
As I watched the Miners being rescued, my mind drifted back to the Chile I knew then, where the not so privileged simmered against Pinochet, who still had a loyal following among the rich.And I realised that this event would change many things for the Chileans - in helping them come together and forge ahead. And, how I wish I was back there in Chile to share this moment!

Idols make me anxious

Ramayana , its stories and their morals were never religion for me. I grew up in a Sikh household and heard these wonderful stories in school and from my friend’s parents and grandparents who would narrate them to us. And in the Northern Indian small towns I stayed, Ram Lila was always a fun outing as was Dusshera, when people would congregate upon a central maidan to see the Ravana effigies burn at dusk.
And I was never different from my Hindu friends even if we did follow different religions and had dissimilar customs.
The 1984 riot shifted that perception a bit, when the fury of the Hindu populace was unleashed on the Sikh community because ‘a tree (indira) had been felled’. Over time,the disenchantment with the Indian law and government remained because many of the perpetrators of those crimes are still strutting around. Still, India is my country and I am fiercely patriotic about it.
So the High Court judgement makes me anxious. Sure I do believe that in the hope for peace and secularism, the Court took the best course of action by dividing the property into three parts. And there is no reason why, in a country like ours, we can’t have a Hindu temple and a Muslim mosque co-exist peacefully next to each other.We have a legacy of religious tolerance.
But building the temple to display a ‘resurgent, strong India’ is not my idea of secularism. That’s why this business of idols makes me anxious. Is it so easy to encroach upon any land merely by placing idols there? And what legal wrongs can be set right when backed by the faith of a billion people (give or take a few million)? And can that happen to me too? Or my religion? What if someone decided that the site of the Golden Temple at Amritsar is actually an ancient Ram site? Or that my house could also have a legend attached to it?
And should this intransigence extend to Nankana Sahib, Guru Nanak’s birthplace now in Pakistan? Should Sikhs not have it in their state? Or will we keep steering towards a Hindu State because of the majority is Hindu? Or continue being a pseudo-secular state?
No body needs to be apologetic in our country about their religion, faith and beliefs, but I absolutely dislike the way religion is used for political gains. And how, despite knowing better, political compulsions will once more ensure that there will be riots and more bad blood - after the CWG and Obama visit.
That’s why the idols make me anxious.

CWG - Representing the true Indian

Why are we all feeling so ashamed of the spectacle that the Commom Wealth Games are turning out to be? We must embrace it coz it truly represents what we Indians are
Proscrastinators - We start out any task with the ‘just in time ‘ attitude.So all preparations, presentations happen just in time and we manage just fine.The CWG preparations will also happen till and after the opening ceremony. So What?
JLT - Just like that . Attention to detail - What’s that? Since we do things just in time , we execute them JLT only. It might be the tacky shoes under fancy clothes at a fashion show, or the wrong flowers at a party or dirty loos at the CW Village.And nothing in life is permanent, so why stress on quality?
Of a higher hygiene order - When the CWG official claimed that the Indian’s hygiene level is different from other countries, he was absolutely right.
We believe in the purificatory properties of water, therefore our bathrooms are always wet. The temples are dirty with the muck that the water picks up.The crematoriums are dirty as is the Holy Ganga. So What?
Our houses are clean because all the garbage is thrown outside. And that outside area is not one’s concern (unless you can encroach upon it somehow).
Likewise, every Indian, from one travelling in a train or a bus to a BMW casually throws the garbage out of the window on to the road. Paan is also meant to be spat out on the roads and buildings - unless ofcourse there is a god’s picture adorning the wall.
Loos everywhere - from temples to airplanes to fancy hotels and multiplexes are ALWAYS dirty.And very likely someone would have also pissed on the ground.And ofcourse, the world is one’s personal loo -so you can piss and defecate anywhere in India.
We dig our noses, scratch our crotches and burp in full public view. So what! That is my janam sidh adhikar.

Ofcourse, we Indians are lazy, corrupt, inefficient and dirty. So What? We were a (supposedly) great people once and can still bask in that glory. We don’t have to follow the Western notions of cleanliness, efficiency and detailing. Please excuse us - we are like that only. We are not and will never rise above our station..So what! Live and let live.

The Indian Middle Class

Everyone talks about the country sitting on gunpowder , waiting to explode any day because of the growing divide between the rich and the poor.
Hello, does anybody even think of the Middle Class and the fact that one day they will wake up to the harsh realities of their existence?
Squeezed like a limp piece of chicken from both sides - the rich on one side whose money gives them everything on a platter . The poor on the other side who walk away with all the benefits because of grants and subsidies.
Paying taxes through their noses, but getting no service. Bad roads and infrastructure, an expensive educational system that does not deliver, reservations that ensure that meritocracy does not stand a chance.
Paying through their noses for bad housing and running pillar to post for subsidised housing. The rich can afford all and the politicians and bureaucrats allot subsidised housing to themselves. The poor only have to squat anywhere and they reap dividends in terms of free housing and free land.
A judicial system that makes you wish you knew an underworld don who would deliver justice through the parallel system. A police force that only services the politicians and one that you would not trust your daughter with.A bureaucracy that is a living nightmare.
Prices that rise , expenses that rise and salaries that don’t keep up.
I think there will be a time that the middle class will also become militant. And stand up for its right.And demand answers on his tax money, incompetent politicians, avaricious bureaucrats. It may even demand to know why everyone shares equal rights as them- when clearly it is the Middle Class that makes this country tick?
Maybe it will already be too late when they do stand up. We might have relinquished our democratic rights already in favour of an oligarchy or even a monarchy!

Security for kids

Obama must be a guy with the highest amount of security. And yet, none of it seems visible and instrusive. At a recent visit to China, hubby darling was in the same hotel as Hilary Clinton and he could not tell.
Of course, lets not get to our politicians in india who have so much visible security - yet they manage to get killed and get mauled with chappals and shoes. They are a story oft repeated.
But I am seeing another class of protected ones. And I feel sorry thinking about the kind of lives they are destined to lead - one without privacy and in full glare of people watching their every move. These are kids (of all ages ) of filmstars, diamond merchants , liquor barons and any other high networth/high profile persons. The bodyguards accompany the kids everywhere. While the kid is in school, they sit outside the school yapping and exchanging notes with other drivers and staff members. They accompany them to gyms , where they stand outside the main area and watch everyone , including young girls sweating it out. The body guards switch on their distress lights and honk maddeningly as they follow the car with the baba log, shooing everyone else off the crowded Mumbai roads.
And I don’t understand how they are protecting their charges? By blaring their horns and creating drama on the roads, they attract attention to the very people they are meant to protect. So a kidnapper does really know whose kid travels in that car. And can decide on the amount of ransom depending on the size and make of the car. Anyone can walk into the gym and shoot those young kids exercising, while their bodyguards try to get close to their bodies.
Perhaps their parents need to watch 24 or take tips from Obama’s security that will really protect their kids.
More importantly, why should I have to pay for their security? I don’t care , would not turn a second time to look at these kids. Then why should my car get bumped off the road and why should someone watch me huffing and panting in the gym?

Indian Loo Habits

If there is one thing that binds the rich Indian and the poor one, a fat Indian and a scrawny one, a North Indian and a South one, it is the loo habits we have. We follow this philosophy of purification by water a little too seriously. The inward and outbound flights from India very quickly have loos that are watery and messy. Most will disregard the humble commode and discharge their waters on the floor of the toilets. And if one does decide to make use of the commode, why not sit half squat or not pick up the covers and spill the effluent all over the place!
Really this one Indian habit really shames me. I can bet that if a study were carried out, Indians would top the list for not knowing how to use public loos. And it is not only one class of people who is the culprit. ALL of us are. I now play a game at the cinemas with Nishna. The better dressed hep babe/aunty will be the one who will leave the loo messy, stare at us balefully and walk out. And I am left complaining loudly.
For myself, I have learnt to carry my own toilet paper and learnt to not follow an Indian into the loo.

Obama Condoms

At the Times Square in New York I experienced something that was truly democratic. At a crossing, there was a guy selling Obama Condoms. Some people held lively discussions with him, some picked up a keepsake condom and others like yours truly smiled and crossed the traffic light.
Later it set me thinking what the Obama Condom truly signified. Freedom of Speech and Expression that is the Fundamental Right in any true democracy. The Obama Condom, whatever the intention of the seller , did not lessen the awe in which most of the world citizens hold Obama . An intelligent , Ivy League College Black guy who has become the most powerful man in the world. An orator par excellence who makes you believe you can!
And can you imagine the same happening in India? Pawar contraceptives,Thackeray condoms or Gandhi birth control pills? And can they be sold at the traffic signal? Chances are some decent citizens will be outraged and will blast you. Else, the n number of political parties looking for issues other than roti, kapda aur makaan will wallop the daylights out of you. The police will arrest you and your family and your building and neighbourhood too! And many obscenity laws will be invoked to keep you among hardened criminals in jail!
We let go of our Freedom of Speech so easily in India. We want to say nothing about politicians or any other person who we consider powerful.A movie like Rajneeti is whetted by the Congress to make sure that there are no similarities with the Gandhi family. The government treads lightly when Canada refuses visas calling our Security outfits terrorists, but issues strong warnings to the author on Sonia’s biography. No Maratha politician bears even the remotest likeness to the Great Shivaji and yet they want to ban a book on him!Why only politicians, even vocal people like Harsha Bhogle and Ravi Shastri kept mum when Sachin Tendulkar cheated in the IPL match this year.And no film reporter worth his salt will report the dalliances and drug abuse of our most popular film stars. We don’t even have the courage to tell people to not spit on the road or wear a clean pair of shoes to the gym!
This makes me mad and upset. Our freedom has come after tremendous struggle and we have been given Rights that should not be frittered away because of inertia or fear.
I should be able to buy Singh condoms at Pali Naka!

To the land of Plenty

Off to the land of plenty and there are plenty of reasons I will find to eat and make merry!
The BIG MAC – there is something about this poor imitation of the original beefburger. The thing is – it satisfies every single time. I can feel the pickle on my tongue already and the whole family will head to this All American icon first thing on arrival!
The clam chowder at Boston and the Vietnamese restaurant at Harvard Square, the hot dog at Central Park – these are the things that good food memories are made of. And what is an early morning drive out without a Coffee Coolata and a BEHC sandwich from Dunkin Donuts? And the yucky candied apple at Disney looks so appealing that I have to absolutely bite into it. The sickly sweet Cinnabon is another must have. Not to mention the generous portions of steak and chicken! And the yummy ice creams and frozen yoghurts! And the deli cuts and cheese. And the Thai, Chinese and Indian also thrown in for good measure.
This feeling that I will not get to eat this food again never leaves me on a holiday. And the humongous portion sizes fit my greed every single time. Fatigue eating hits an all time high driven by fatigue from enjoying at the theme parks and fatigue from shopping too much! Then I eat coz I am happy and I eat coz I am angry about something.
The land of aplenty has gorgeous fruits and salads too – Come again? My mind switches off to those possibilities atleast!
So I will eat and come back many kgs heavier and look at the weighing scales in horror. And tell my self – I don’t know what happened!!!
And get back to trying to lose these kgs before starting to lose the weight I had put on last summer!
Oh.did I mention that I will also get two different sizes of clothes – one to fit into now and one that I will fit into six (eight, ten ) months later!

Getting away scotfree?

Does anybody really go scotfree? I believe not. Even when the law of the land does not catch up with you, there is a higher power that makes sure that life evens out. Has Warren Anderson walked away scotfree? Well our dirty politicians that took money to help the white skin (actually it could be any colour as long as the money was deep and smelt good!) and he has never stood before an Indian court to be dealt a punishment. Now despite the fact that media and others are baying for his blood, chances are that Anderson will kick the bucket before anything comes of it.
But he has not gotten away scotfree. Even if his conscience does not bother him, people around him would view him with suspicion and he would never have been above reproach. Maybe nobody spoke up in front of him about killing those poor brown Indians, but worse, they would have discussed it behind his back. And I wonder what his kids and wife thought of him. Surely it is not a pleasant feeling to not be above suspicion.
People such as these enjoy no goodwill. The Ansals got away lightly in the court, but a lot of people I know dropped them from their social lists. I have no positive thoughts for them and really, as a business family they have not gone anywhere. Tytler and other perpetrators of the ’84 Sikh riots are not a happy lot and have spent a lifetime trying to escape the noose.
Karma works – every single time. You only need to look around you to see it work. Justice happens and happens well. I am always reminded of what Rose Dawson said of the people who got saved after the Titanic sank. “Afterward, the people in the boats had nothing to do but wait. Wait to die. Wait to live. Wait for an absolution that would never come.”Even a non believer like me believes in this.

What would I do?

Jessica Lal and Ruchika Girhotra - Two young girls, who lost their lives to the system. A system that lets people abuse their power and not bring timely justice to the ones affected. I have a young daughter, who I love tons – more than my life indeed. I never say no to her and indulge her coz I don’t know what tomorrow will bring for her. I hope she will find a guy who will love her to distraction and pamper her to distraction. I hope she will study and create a niche for her self and earn lots of her own personal money !
But sometimes I wonder what would happen if someone did something to her? Would I take that person / persons to the court to demand justice? I would have to run pillar to post for years in the court. If the perpetrators would be someone powerful ,my daughter will be branded the whore. Media would also indulge in defamation and mud slinging .
And thus in the Indian system, the victim would be further victimized, until she would lose whatever perspective , self esteem and confidence she will have.
What would I do therefore? I don’t think I would approach the police or the courts. There is a parallel system of justice that does exist and I would utilize that. Whether that would mean beating the guy senseless or skinning him alive, castrating him or killing him I would do it. I would protect my daughter and deliver justice to her. And the world be damned!

LOOP Mobile - How to lose a client in six weeks?

LOOP Mobile - How to lose a client in six weeks?

Have you ever wondered how you can lose a loyal customer to another company? Look no further – it is called bad customer service.
Week 1
Have been a loyal BPL / Loop mobile customer for almost seven years. The phone lines don’t drop as much as Airtel and reception is good most of the time. The number has been my lifeline for ever now. But is for ever, really forever?
Week 2
Two years after Praneet quit Piramal, someone in Loop or Piramal finally woke up. Mine is no longer a company phone, so it must be put on the personal account. Get a call from Loop to change the account into personal. Must send proof of address and Praneet’s photo since the phone is in his name.
Week 3
Phone service stalled. And like an ass, I kept looking at my phone thinking that there was a problem at the service provider’s end. Much later at night ‘bati jali mere dimag mein’ and I called Loop mobile. ‘Sorry Madam, but we needed your photo so we disconnected the phone’. Huh? How about informing me first? ‘Government policy’ madam.Ok, so where do I give the photo in Bandra?’ Uh, you have to come to Mahim Madam.’ First round of shouting and someone activates the phone and comes home to collect the photo.
Week 4
Go out of town and my phone does not work again. What now? Am phoneless for three days. In the meantime Mom from Nigeria panics coz I am unreachable. She calls sister in Thailand who calls daughter’s Vodafone number and checks on me. When I come back to Mumbai and call Loop Mobile, I am told that I don’t have roaming on my phone. Pray tell why? ‘This is a new account Madam. If you want to apply for it, you have to pay 2,500’. I rationalize – this is an old number and I have been a customer forever and ever. ‘Yes, but now this has been transferred on your name so we will treat it as a new account. Government rules’
Much shouting, to no avail. Atleast in Mumbai the phone is working. And on my weekly visits to Karjat, I don’t have to be accessible to anyone!
Week 5
Dial Mom’s number in Nigeria. Cant get thru. Call Loop again. ‘Sorry Madam. You don’t have ISD either’. OK! How do I get it? ‘You have to pay Rs.6000 to activate this. Cant you add it to my bill. No Madam we can’t. Government rules. ‘Ok, say I . where do I pay? ‘At the Mahim Branch.’
Good thing I think. Will call from Praneet’s phone and avoid clocking up a huge bill of my own.
Week 6
Get a message at 12 in the afternoon saying that my ‘credit limit of Rs.1500 has been exhausted. Please pay to avoid disconnection’. At 6 in the evening on my way home, the phone is not working again. Call the customer service people to be told that I have to pay asap for the account to start. But, I protest, you need to give me atleast a 12 hour notice..I cant handle this while I handle other things in office. Also , when my phone usage is Rs6000 on an average, why would you give me a credit limit of Rs1500. Am I supposed to visit the Loop Mobile place every week? ‘Sorry Madam, Government rules.’
Now Government and Loop Mobile be damned. I am going to another service provider. And their collection agents can chase me for an year now. After all I have had to come into office today when I could have chilled at home because of the railway men strike. And I did not get the message on my suspended account!

Pot Calling the Kettle black?

I am a bit fazed and confused by this whole Lalit Modi drama. The issue seems to be simple - there was pots of money being made from the IPL - some legal and some below the radar. There might have been match fixing and teams being allocated to friends . Lalit Modi may have used his private aircraft and billed it to IPL. IPL may also have been paying out large sums of money for his four seasons suite. And so on and so forth.
My point is - what is new? Is that not what everyone in this country and every other country do the same? Where there is money, pots of it to be made, do these things not occur? Look at our holier than thou politicians. In this very generation, most of them have become super duper rich. They own vast tracts of land, they have business interests in everything.And they don't even deliver value. When was the last time, a politician acknowledged and said 'I am not sorry to have stolen your money. I am arrogant about it too.This country is my personal fiefdom and I use the money to further my family's interests .I really see no reason why I should give you anything in return. If you act smart with me, i will bump you off. '
The story about Praful Patel's daughter 'chartering' out planes and about Pawar's daughter's stake in one of the franchisees has been quietly buried.Tharoor has been told to resign and cool off.
Atleast Lalit Modi delivered - and how. IPL is big, brash , over the top and great fun. It makes one optimistic that in the coming years, the sports infrastructure will improve so that Indians can perform better. A whole new generation of young indians got an opportunity to play with the big wigs of International and Indian Cricket.
The fuddy duddies of BCCI have been fuming for a while. But they really need to look within their hearts and ask themselves if they could have pulled off an IPL like Lalit Modi?
Politicians with all their foul money and bureaucrats with all their power cannot have done this. This required a person like Modi who is widely travelled, has a taste for good things and a vision to have executed this project impeccably.
So lets not hang him!

TERRORIST THACKERAYS

I am feeling pissed and let down. Why the hell is there so much bandobast for Rahul Gandhi? Don’t get me wrong..he is the best thing that could have happened to Indian Politics and he has killer dimples and looks. But the Centre and State machinery have been deployed; Rahul’s schedule changes because the powers are anxious about the Sena acting up. If this is the haal of the First Family what hope for regular manoos? Why is the Thackeray family not being arrested and tried for treason? Since when did they get the divine right to inherit Mumbai?? They have consistently gone against the Indian identity and focussed on the Marathi Manoos. They have not won the mandate from the Marathis either. They cause immense trauma to the very same people they purport to support. So, should Mumbai become their playground and when any Thackeray barks, this nation of the argumentative one billion and its politicians shut up? Charge them with terrorism and try them for treason. And make them pay for doing this to Mumbai every single time.
But maybe they are actually doing Congress a huge favour. These stupid acts will increase membership in the Congress drive in the City! I am going to register!

Letting it go!

I am one of those people who find it exceptionally hard to let things go. It could be a roadside mawali who is eve teasing, a boss who is unreasonable or even a relationship gone sour. I persevere at the stupidest of things till I find closure. And that closure can sometimes take forever!
One thing that I want to let go of and that won’t leave me is my weight! Slowly but steadily I have built it up on one pretext or the other – that I am the mother of two, kids need a cushion and not a stick to cuddle into, after 35 it is impossible to lose weight, I have to eat comfort foods coz my lifestyle is so stressed, I am khatte pitte ghar ki , Serdi women look pretty with stretched glowing skins blah blah blah. I think the biggest problem is that I don’t perceive myself in my thoughts as ‘fat’ person. I am not even pleasantly plump when I think of myself. I am slim and sexy!
But this world belongs to slim women – I swear! No store stocks my size, men of my age eye slim women and I suspect, slim women also have an unfair advantage at work.
So I have decided to lose weight. And I am pitting myself against Ashish Jagtiani who is also chronicling his attempts to lose weight in Mumbai Mirror. So let’s see if I do manage to lose weight till my birthday (hmm – ok – only 5 kgs!)And If I do lose more weight than Ashish (aka Jaggu of the Jaggu –Tarana fame)!

Wish me luck!! And I will post my progress!

The three morons

The actor, producer and director of the three idiots are the morons in this petty credits drama. Vidhu Chopra and Aamir Khan have been known to hog the limelight in the past too.The story is CB's - whether 5% or 70%. The story credit is his. This episode also brings forth the moral ineptitude of the film fraternity. Why are they so egoistical that they cannot give credit where due? This kind of a thing would not happen in Hollywood, where talent and creativity is applauded. But he wants credit that is due to him. The three morons are upto their histrionics on media - shouting, character mud slinging and what have you. Instead of bleating that they spent 3 years writing the story, Raju needs to step back to consider this - CB put in his lifetime of experiences in this story. Perhaps they all forget what struggle has brought them here and what humility really means. This is the most sickening and brazen thing I have seen in years.
This also does not bode well for someone like me who is taking the first baby steps into writing. I am constantly worried about how to present my story to the publisher so he won’t steal it away and not pay me! And what legal recourse will I have then??
Maybe WTP and MMCH were easier!!